Round 3 of chemotherapy has kicked my ass.
I am tired. Angry. Bitter. Yet disgustingly positive that I will see through this darkness and laugh in the face of this bullshit disease. This is the darkest post I hope to ever make. The curse words and anger will undoubtedly see Ellen and the rest of the daytime talk show circuit exclude me from their shows of hope. I don’t care. This blog was made to cheer up the real fighters of cancer. Those who have gone through so much more than I. Those colon cancer survivors who have done 20 plus rounds of chemotherapy while still keeping their shit together (no pun intended). I’m a fool Third round. Chemo fighter. Losing it.
I self talk. I yell to the Gods. I beg for my legs to move!! They respond like beaten dogs, afraid of their master.
Here is an excerpt of today’s, The Funny Thing About Cancer:
I write, not for everyone else. Although, it sounds nice when I say I want to have a book in every cancer center across North America. I really do. I just know that, first of all, society, we are pretty full of shit. No one reads. My best bet would be a dual DVD with Katy Perry where she laments on the fact that positivity is the key to happiness. Hopefully she is in something skimpy, then people would watch. She wouldn’t be wrong, good old Katy. But us cancer fighters, we know, positivity doesn’t make your legs work. It doesn’t make your eyes want to open and it certainly doesn’t make you look healthy, feel healthy and want to do healthy things.
Some days, I just pray to God. A God, I don’t even believe it. I wish I had Ellen’s phone to call God. Hoping, he or she will forgive the fact that I don’t have anything to do with their charitable donation scheme; then spit down some magic to make me feel okay. I don’t think that’ll ever happen, but it sure is funny to think about.
Ill just be the shark dancing to it’s own tune. For now.
I love all of you for helping me through this fight.
Please help me with this book, or not. Just share this page. Anything. I am a fighter. I am a comedian. I am a brother. I am a winner. And I will help others beat this garbage disease.